So You’re Attracted To A Younger Man …

by Cherry Norris on April 29, 2015

One of the most popular questions I receive is "Am I crazy for being attracted to a younger man?"

Well, no, you're not crazy!

If you're a vibrant "older" woman (who looks much younger than your age) then it's only natural to find yourself attracted to a younger man.

Even if he's not at all what you expect, there are many advantages to dating a cute, hot, younger man.

The problem is if he's young, unsteady and still figuring out what he wants in life, does it leave room for romance?

Today's video gives you a fun, fail-proof tip on what to do when you're attracted to a younger man who's unsure about his future.

Before moving on, see what you can do when you feel a deep connection with a younger man who maybe isn't "romance ready."

In the comments section below, tell me how you feel about dating a younger man who's still mapping out his future.




{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }

Kristina May 1, 2015 at 11:54 am

So here’s an interesting story. I’m a 47 year-old woman, and the guy who considers himself my boyfriend and has asked me to marry him over the last year and a bit…is 22. I’m not joking. Lol. 25 years difference. (And no, I’m not a mama or coach figure to him either). But I’m also old enough to be realistic and have less attachment to the relationship because I can see future obvious pitfalls. I am enjoying our fun for now, however, and figured he would have moved on months ago. Lol. (I’ve even tried a few times to let him go as I figure he will likely want to experience a family one day, as an example, or someone who can physically keep up. I think very selflessly when it comes to him).

He’s a very attractive guy and while I’m mistaken for someone in my twenties all the time (I was even ID’d at a restaurant a few weeks ago), this age spread seems large to me. And I’m pretty confident that in a few years as I start aging, it’ll look mighty strange to see us walking down the street, hand in hand. I’m already self-conscious about it. Lol! While it’s true that our energies connect and he’s wise beyond his years, geez, my kids are older than he is. But oddly enough, his parents totally support the relationship and love me to death. Not at all what I expected.

I’m not sure where I’m going with this… it’s a rather unusual story I would imagine, and I’d love to hear Cherry’s take or anyone else’s on this. 🙂


Deborah June 12, 2015 at 9:05 pm

Hey Kristina!

That is great you have found a love connection with this younger man.  I am 52 and my man is 26 so I know what it feels like to be with someone so much younger.  I have worried about the whole thing about me aging and him still being attracted/in love with me in the future, but young men who love us older women are just wired differently!  They are not hung up o the physical part of us as women but they love the whole person.  I hope it goes well for you!  I say keep it going as long as the love lasts!


Anna April 2, 2016 at 11:19 pm


I am 46 and, like you, look like I'm in my 20s. I usually date younger men because I have more in common with them. I just ended a relationship with a 21 year old because he 'checked out' of the relationship when wewere living together. It may not be common for such a huge age gap but I have experienced it many times in my life.


Alexandra August 20, 2013 at 5:31 pm

Dear Cherry,
You are the most dynamic, gracious, intelligent counselor I have ever met.  Your advice is always good for building relationships on, wether its a romantic interest, friendship, family, etc.  Thank you. 
I look forward to your emails and am grateful that our lives have crossed.
Alexandra, New York, NY


Cherry August 20, 2013 at 10:38 pm

Thanks so much for your note.  So happy you're receiving value from the info!
Love, Cherry


LPF August 2, 2013 at 10:50 pm

Cherry, you are sensible, practical and right, as always. Thank you so much for your wonderful tips! They have truly helped a lot! 🙂


Cherry August 20, 2013 at 10:39 pm

Thanks much, LPF!! 🙂


Janise August 2, 2013 at 3:16 pm

I say from experience this is bad advice! Walk away ASAP!!!… Your are middle aged and need a man who has already arrived not some boy who doesn't know what he even wants yet. It will take him years to get his act together and when he does you will be 57 and he 47 and he will go for a younger woman who can give him babies. Go for someone closer to your own age who already knows who he is and is already established & who will treat you right in every way including financially. So many young men are just attracted to the idea of being with an older woman not you personally. They will soon outgrow this phase and move onto someone younger. Think Ashton Kutcher/Demi Moore… You will just be used by him until he has become the man he wants only to be to attract a younger chick he can be proud of himself and his accomplishments with. You deserve better. At our age, I'm 49, it is natural to be attracted to younger men, and we still will be attracted to younger men like him  in our 70's but we must realize it is just an attraction to their young hotness and not something to be acted on. We will always feel young at heart but when we look in the mirror at at our drivers lisence we will see our true age and should date age appropriate! 


LPF August 2, 2013 at 10:48 pm

You are wrong, Janise. It is you who is giving bad advice. What you are saying is classic ageism. Do you seriously believe a man who is "age appropriate" is guaranteed to love and cherish you forever and will never leave you and never move on to a younger woman? You're dreaming! And are all younger men to be automatically looked down upon as just "boys"? You're blind! There are plenty of younger men who are far more mature and more loving than older "age appropriate" men. Choosing men to have relationships with based on their age and not on the person who they are is, I think, rather narrow-minded and would very probably set up heartbreak and pain for ourselves down the road. It also doesn't feel nice to be told what I *should* and *should not* do and who I *should* and *should not* date.


Ann August 2, 2013 at 11:25 am

Great advice Cherry!


Danielle April 2, 2012 at 3:54 am

RUN! He’s already shown you who he is. And that is… someone who is not ready for a relationship. Only time will change that. And you are wasting yours waiting for him. Trust me – I’m reeling from a break up with a man 13 years younger than me. I should’ve walked away 2 years ago.


Charly March 30, 2012 at 7:40 pm

Cherry, sounds good……….I’m not sure that’s the whole answer because, in the real world it goes like this. You may get more attached to him and when you realize it a serious decision has to be made.

Walking away at the beginning may be the better part of valor.

Please send me some feedback on this. Charly


Ella March 30, 2012 at 5:44 pm

smart advice, Cherry! 🙂


Cherry Norris March 30, 2012 at 8:12 pm

Hi Charly,

Thanks for your note. It’s my opinion, when you feel chemistry with a man and he’s not hurting you in any way, it’s a good idea to stay for as long as you can to explore it. Don’t have sex and keep dating others to keep from getting too attached. If the man can’t get it together, the chemistry will naturally wane and the decision to leave will be easy.

Walking away too soon, you miss an opportunity. Or you’ll repeat a similar experience with a different man. Stay until the lesson is complete or until there’s no longer any energy between you!

Hope this helps.

Love, Cherry


Cherry Norris March 30, 2012 at 8:12 pm

Thanks Ella 🙂


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